Foto bij 356 - Emma

My hand has been squeezed to the point I thought it might fall off, but if that's what Kenna needs, I'm more than willing to do it for her.
Tom and Brie take the spot from time to time, switching positions during every contraction. It's also why I notice that Brie is a little distracted. I noticed him on the phone during one of my shifts, and now he's just pacing back and forth.
He still seems calm, but it's almost like he's doing something to distract himself. When I make eye contact with him, he just smiles and nods, as if to let me know he's doing alright.
As a nurse comes in to tell us there's someone outside for us, I offer to go out at first, ready for a breath of air that isn't filled with Kenna's screaming, but Gabriel cuts me off.
"That's for me," he apologises, "I'll go."
He opens the door way too quick, as if he's hiding whatever or whomever is behind it from someone. I'm guessing that someone is me, which is confirmed when I faintly hear conversation and recognise the voice immediately.
Lucien. I shouldn't be surprised, nor can I be mad, because Lucien is still Brie's friend, and he probably here just because Brie asked him to.
Just knowing he's a few metres away from me makes my heart drop, though, and now I'm the one pacing back and forth.
"He won't be coming in," Tom smiles at me as Kenna chews on a handful of icecubes as her only form of nutrition during labour. "Don't worry about it."
I try and shake it off, pretend I'm not worried, but I damn well know they both know his presence gives me goosebumps. "I know, I'm just..."
"Are you sure you don't want to go out there?" Kenna says, her contractions having died down a little.
"Excuse me, what happened to 'Lucien is a dick and if you ever see him again you should kick him in the balls so hard he will be infertile for life', Kenna?"
The comment makes Tom groan, probably feeling it in his entire being as Kenna waves the comment away.
"I still think he's a dick," she shrugs, "but he also helped me, and I saw the pain on his face when he heard your voice and when we mentioned you, Em..."
"He should've thought of that," I push my sleeves, that have rolled down, back up again, "before he left me and made out with every model on the planet."
"I'm not saying you have to get back together with him," from the way she squeezes her eyes shut I can tell she's in pain again. "I'm just saying maybe you two could just talk, bury the battle axe you're still swinging whenever the other one is brought up."
"Why should I be the one to make the first move towards being a decent human being? He's the one who lied and kept secrets from me, he's the one who posted that dumb video, he's the one..."
Kenna interrupts my sentence with a loud moan, her grip on Tom's arm tightening visibly.
"No more arguing," Tom advices, giving the both of us a stern look. "No matter how much I agree with Kenna..."
"Don't you start, too," I groan, taking the cup of ice from Kenna's hand before she can crush it.
"Come on, Emma, I have to. You should've seen him when he waited with Kenna. He looked broken, and when Brie asked if Kenna had called you, his face just... changed. Like he was waiting for you to come around the corner so he could just catch a glimpse of you," he looks me in the eye as his free hand is slowly stroking Kenna's sweat soaked hair. "I'm not saying he deserves your forgiveness, because what he did was absolutely shitty and he deserves to hear that for the rest of eternity, but... I really don't think he did it in cold blood."
I shake my head, taking an ice cube myself so I can grind it between my teeth to stop focussing on my heart, that's almost pounding out of my chest. "No more Lucien talk, I don't want today to be about that. I want it to be about the baby."
Kenna groans, obviously mid contraction. "And what I want is for you to go out there and at least say hello," her eyes were squeezed shut, but they shoot open and she's looking at me with an angry glare. "He's a dick and you can definitely let him know, but if I want anything from today, I want my baby to be a true Christmas miracle. And miracles produce other miracles, so you two should at least look each other in the eye."
"Don't argue with a pregnant woman getting ready to push an entire baby out of her vagina, because I will punch you," she warns me. "Go out there or I'll call him in here and I'll personally drag the both of you together, even if it means I have to get out of this bed and leak all over the floor."
Tom just looks at me, nodding. I know full well there's nothing else for me to do than listen to her, because she actually will fight me if I don't.
Subconciously, I check myself in the mirror. I look tired, because today was supposed to just be dinner with Jesse and Kate, and also because I have been in this hospital room for a few hours now.
"Brie's still out there," Tom tells me, gesturing for me to leave. "You'll be fine, just say hi. Try not to cuss him out, but if you do, use child friendly language."
I roll my eyes at him, making my way to the door. It feels extra heavy as I push it open, a movement that feels like it lasts hours.
They're sat in the waiting area together, seemingly talking for a little bit.
Brie is the first to look up and I try to focus on that, but I can't.
He looks good, he really does. A little... off, maybe, but I can't blame him considering the circumstances.
"Hey, Em," Brie smiles at me, patting on the backpack he's got in his lap. "Needed a break?"

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