Story: Heavy In Your Arms | Harry Styles
“Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from nineteen to here and all the same feel like nineteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breath in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes. And that's only because you're trying your hardest and your hardest and your hardest to push away the only feeling, the only thought, the only thing that's the most important to you. More like a person. A person who got your heart and a person who got your soul and a person who was too blinded by worries and a person who broke you without even realizing. And that person is the person you push away from your thoughts and yourself so you can be fine in five minutes. You hope.” - She said.
“I remember when I was like five or six years old and my mum would tell me stories about love, friendship and sacrifice. She would keep telling me the same stories over and over again, until I was old enough to find out these stories were actually my mum’s.
‘Now you need to make your own stories, about these three things.’ she said. ‘But you don’t have to do it now. Take your time. Your whole life, even.’
From that moment on I kept looking for situations where I could write my stories about. I couldn’t wait to tell them to my mum, and make her proud.
Years passed by, and I still hadn’t experienced something related to love, friendship or sacrifice. I got frustrated, realizing I could never have these long stories like my mum had. That was until I met this girl. We went through so much that I couldn’t even remember everything. It was when she’d left I realized,
being with my mum.
‘Mum,’ I said. ‘I need to tell you my stories. You remember? Love, friendship and sacrifice, like you said.’
Mum looked at me surprisingly, clearly not expecting this at my age already. I was nineteen.
‘Tell me then, sweetheart.’ she said. ‘What’s your love? Your friendship? Your sacrifice?’
I smiled weakly, now obviously remembering everything the girl and I had shared together. ‘A friend, a very very very good friend, is what she was. And she still is, of course.’
Mum smiled at me. I felt uncomfortable.
‘And love... she’s got my heart, mum. Every single piece of it, and I don’t need to have it back at all. She can have it. As long as I can have hers, it’s okay. It’s definitely okay.’
Mum smiled again. Her eyes began to water. I still felt uncomfortable.
‘What would you sacrifice, sweetheart?’ she said softly. I first touched my face, then my lips. Seconds later I touched my neck, then my chest, right where my heart was pounding underneath the skin. When I began to talk, I didn’t feel uncomfortable anymore.
‘I’d sacrifice everything I have. I’d sacrifice all my money. I’d sacrifice my friends and maybe family, too, for God’s sake. Just to keep it simple... I’d sacrifice my life. I’d give it to her. If I needed to, I’d die for her. I really would. If she could only live with me being dead, then I would be. It’s for her, mum. It’s all for her. If she'd just see.’” - He said.
‘Now you need to make your own stories, about these three things.’ she said. ‘But you don’t have to do it now. Take your time. Your whole life, even.’
From that moment on I kept looking for situations where I could write my stories about. I couldn’t wait to tell them to my mum, and make her proud.
Years passed by, and I still hadn’t experienced something related to love, friendship or sacrifice. I got frustrated, realizing I could never have these long stories like my mum had. That was until I met this girl. We went through so much that I couldn’t even remember everything. It was when she’d left I realized,
being with my mum.
‘Mum,’ I said. ‘I need to tell you my stories. You remember? Love, friendship and sacrifice, like you said.’
Mum looked at me surprisingly, clearly not expecting this at my age already. I was nineteen.
‘Tell me then, sweetheart.’ she said. ‘What’s your love? Your friendship? Your sacrifice?’
I smiled weakly, now obviously remembering everything the girl and I had shared together. ‘A friend, a very very very good friend, is what she was. And she still is, of course.’
Mum smiled at me. I felt uncomfortable.
‘And love... she’s got my heart, mum. Every single piece of it, and I don’t need to have it back at all. She can have it. As long as I can have hers, it’s okay. It’s definitely okay.’
Mum smiled again. Her eyes began to water. I still felt uncomfortable.
‘What would you sacrifice, sweetheart?’ she said softly. I first touched my face, then my lips. Seconds later I touched my neck, then my chest, right where my heart was pounding underneath the skin. When I began to talk, I didn’t feel uncomfortable anymore.
‘I’d sacrifice everything I have. I’d sacrifice all my money. I’d sacrifice my friends and maybe family, too, for God’s sake. Just to keep it simple... I’d sacrifice my life. I’d give it to her. If I needed to, I’d die for her. I really would. If she could only live with me being dead, then I would be. It’s for her, mum. It’s all for her. If she'd just see.’” - He said.
You are my best friend as well as my lover, and I do not know which side of you I enjoy the most. I treasure each side, just as I have treasured our life together.
One Direction exist
Erm
Enjoy the story
WRITTEN BY ME
Erm
Enjoy the story
WRITTEN BY ME
A sequel of this finished story
Reading The Moon Is Down first could be an option to get to understand this second part better, although it was written years ago and my writing has improved since. Please don't judge too quick
Reading The Moon Is Down first could be an option to get to understand this second part better, although it was written years ago and my writing has improved since. Please don't judge too quick
ALERT
Het begin van dit verhaal kan de indruk geven dat het een typische carrot story is; en dat is het dus écht niet! Lees een paar hoofdstukjes door en je zult het vanzelf zien!
Het begin van dit verhaal kan de indruk geven dat het een typische carrot story is; en dat is het dus écht niet! Lees een paar hoofdstukjes door en je zult het vanzelf zien!
Hoofdstukken
| Titel | Woorden | Gelezen | Aangepast | Dear diary | 202 | 3786 | 5 jaar geleden | Play | 747 | 3277 | 5 jaar geleden | Journey | 644 | 2339 | 5 jaar geleden | Warmth | 585 | 2001 | 5 jaar geleden | Sleep | 736 | 1981 | 5 jaar geleden | Dear diary | 184 | 1929 | 5 jaar geleden | Distance | 624 | 1884 | 5 jaar geleden | Dreams | 944 | 1791 | 5 jaar geleden | You | 1047 | 1793 | 5 jaar geleden | Plans | 1017 | 1690 | 5 jaar geleden | Prepare | 749 | 1784 | 5 jaar geleden | Confess | 1060 | 1817 | 5 jaar geleden | His name | 661 | 1989 | 5 jaar geleden | Hugs and love | 832 | 1974 | 5 jaar geleden | Ignoscency | 642 | 1790 | 5 jaar geleden | Talk that talk | 1028 | 1974 | 5 jaar geleden | What I've been told | 1461 | 1831 | 5 jaar geleden | Son, father and guilt | 1019 | 1998 | 5 jaar geleden | Home is where the heart is | 1229 | 1848 | 5 jaar geleden | Nerves and sweat | 809 | 1965 | 5 jaar geleden | Dear diary | 128 | 1902 | 5 jaar geleden | Shock | 1027 | 1841 | 5 jaar geleden | Flashback | 3139 | 1941 | 5 jaar geleden | Garden work | 925 | 1992 | 5 jaar geleden | Expose the secrets | 1115 | 1939 | 5 jaar geleden | Acceptance | 1344 | 1899 | 5 jaar geleden | TCA's | 168 | 1813 | 5 jaar geleden | Meet you, meet me | 1082 | 2003 | 5 jaar geleden | Cool down | 1167 | 1967 | 5 jaar geleden | Eat your food | 992 | 1866 | 5 jaar geleden | Clean your thoughts | 945 | 2136 | 5 jaar geleden | See the stars with you | 1886 | 2089 | 5 jaar geleden | Cry me a river | 1458 | 1987 | 5 jaar geleden | Don't you worry | 1731 | 1820 | 5 jaar geleden | Comfort me | 1228 | 1843 | 5 jaar geleden | Wake me up | 1288 | 1819 | 5 jaar geleden | Dear diary | 203 | 1694 | 5 jaar geleden | Call and clarify | 1282 | 1786 | 5 jaar geleden | Dinner | 1787 | 1934 | 5 jaar geleden | Reflection | 1686 | 1661 | 5 jaar geleden | Take your time | 1529 | 1858 | 5 jaar geleden | Our plan | 1908 | 1836 | 5 jaar geleden | Stay | 1028 | 1780 | 5 jaar geleden | Confused | 1272 | 1800 | 5 jaar geleden | Feelings | 1164 | 1827 | 5 jaar geleden | Good morning | 1362 | 1686 | 5 jaar geleden | Comforting kiss | 1791 | 1863 | 5 jaar geleden | Let me help you | 1637 | 1723 | 5 jaar geleden | Together rather than alone | 1443 | 1422 | 5 jaar geleden | It'll be fine | 1404 | 1803 | 5 jaar geleden | Building's high like I am for you | 1791 | 1646 | 5 jaar geleden | Curlyhead | 1276 | 1583 | 5 jaar geleden | Tears | 2540 | 2061 | 5 jaar geleden | Dear diary | 121 | 1531 | 5 jaar geleden | Be safe | 1163 | 1610 | 5 jaar geleden | Desiring lack | 4086 | 1748 | 5 jaar geleden | What am I doing? | 2476 | 1618 | 5 jaar geleden | Tea | 3803 | 1438 | 5 jaar geleden | Pizza's | 2279 | 1602 | 5 jaar geleden | Tongues and everything | 1325 | 1600 | 5 jaar geleden | Warm touch | 2318 | 1672 | 5 jaar geleden | Frown | 2099 | 1557 | 5 jaar geleden | Leave | 3062 | 1232 | 5 jaar geleden | Beach | 2516 | 1463 | 4 jaar geleden | Lost | 1923 | 1733 | 4 jaar geleden | Hugs | 2359 | 1289 | 4 jaar geleden | Breaths | 1156 | 1253 | 4 jaar geleden | Trailer | 74 | 1050 | 4 jaar geleden | Dear diary | 287 | 1031 | 4 jaar geleden | (Not?) Giving up | 2998 | 1110 | 4 jaar geleden | My choice | 1738 | 1220 | 4 jaar geleden | Meet all of you | 3561 | 1295 | 4 jaar geleden | Uneasiness | 1987 | 1191 | 4 jaar geleden | Your brother | 2246 | 1219 | 4 jaar geleden | Concerten | 116 | 987 | 4 jaar geleden | Mijn (concert)ervaringen | 3110 | 967 | 4 jaar geleden | Dusseldorf!!! | 168 | 896 | 4 jaar geleden | Diner? Diner. | 2021 | 1135 | 4 jaar geleden | British nights | 5327 | 1290 | 4 jaar geleden | Can't resist it no more | 3239 | 1230 | 4 jaar geleden | Shameful subjects | 2707 | 1090 | 4 jaar geleden | See you later (alligator) | 3164 | 1051 | 4 jaar geleden | Dear diary | 144 | 852 | 4 jaar geleden | My story | 1324 | 1035 | 4 jaar geleden | Meeting you again | 4915 | 1098 | 4 jaar geleden | Hotels and pizza (and you) | 2014 | 1065 | 4 jaar geleden | Period issues | 1494 | 1004 | 4 jaar geleden | Paparazzi | 2983 | 1038 | 4 jaar geleden | You ok? | 2571 | 1251 | 4 jaar geleden | Fancy the beauty in her dress | 2585 | 1077 | 4 jaar geleden | Hunger in the suit | 2719 | 1040 | 4 jaar geleden | Guilt | 2739 | 1171 | 4 jaar geleden | Don't let me go | 2392 | 1217 | 4 jaar geleden | Oops | 53 | 842 | 4 jaar geleden | Not a clue | 2693 | 1042 | 4 jaar geleden | Phonecalls | 3481 | 1085 | 4 jaar geleden | I missed you | 4130 | 1079 | 4 jaar geleden | Realize the solution | 3240 | 1057 | 4 jaar geleden | Promise me | 3021 | 1165 | 4 jaar geleden | Surprise, sweetheart | 4385 | 990 | 4 jaar geleden | Fears and tears | 3591 | 1321 | 4 jaar geleden | Touch me | 5470 | 1138 | 4 jaar geleden | Sleepless nights | 2222 | 951 | 4 jaar geleden | Weird feelings | 2924 | 942 | 4 jaar geleden | Hey, you | 2566 | 824 | 3 jaar geleden | Wait, what? | 1522 | 908 | 3 jaar geleden | Share your feelings | 1869 | 1016 | 3 jaar geleden | Don't you worry, beautiful | 2741 | 997 | 3 jaar geleden | Soothing you (a little too well) | 2438 | 1069 | 3 jaar geleden | Nervously loving | 2147 | 864 | 3 jaar geleden | The big day's begun | 2593 | 774 | 3 jaar geleden | Meet your brother | 2827 | 741 | 3 jaar geleden | Loving you | 2760 | 920 | 3 jaar geleden | Other reasons | 2681 | 778 | 3 jaar geleden | Goodnight kiss | 2676 | 795 | 3 jaar geleden | Accepting us | 2423 | 684 | 3 jaar geleden | Senses coming to life | 2037 | 670 | 3 jaar geleden | Guilt | 1475 | 702 | 3 jaar geleden | Openly dining | 2767 | 636 | 3 jaar geleden | Quit | 2229 | 638 | 3 jaar geleden | Wash away the sadness | 2193 | 630 | 3 jaar geleden | If you come to me | 2212 | 747 | 3 jaar geleden | When she calls | 2551 | 673 | 3 jaar geleden | Intensely talking | 2617 | 761 | 3 jaar geleden | Pulling away | 3293 | 718 | 3 jaar geleden | Open up | 2361 | 800 | 3 jaar geleden | Het mooiste concert ooit in Londen, 25/9 | 1894 | 604 | 3 jaar geleden | If I lay here | 1960 | 631 | 3 jaar geleden | What's bothering you? | 2059 | 568 | 3 jaar geleden | Wasn't it a joke? | 2302 | 525 | 3 jaar geleden | No shame | 2780 | 596 | 3 jaar geleden | Come talk to me | 1576 | 557 | 3 jaar geleden | The speech (teaser) | 1522 | 795 | 3 jaar geleden | Gather us together | 2481 | 521 | 3 jaar geleden | Throw me a tantrum | 2141 | 619 | 3 jaar geleden | Heavy in your arms | 2383 | 613 | 3 jaar geleden | Guilty tears | 1721 | 497 | 3 jaar geleden | If I could fly | 1763 | 532 | 3 jaar geleden | Calm me down | 2928 | 541 | 3 jaar geleden | We love you | 1428 | 529 | 3 jaar geleden | Hold me close | 1485 | 547 | 3 jaar geleden | Want a drink? | 1799 | 502 | 3 jaar geleden | Let me worry | 2924 | 496 | 3 jaar geleden | Hollywood Walk of Coldness | 1613 | 514 | 3 jaar geleden | Cigarettes and cups of water | 1896 | 531 | 2 jaar geleden | Only mean well | 2239 | 489 | 2 jaar geleden | Morning sessions | 1607 | 446 | 2 jaar geleden | Shudder | 1727 | 542 | 2 jaar geleden | Sleepy tantrums and a happy embrace | 2122 | 501 | 2 jaar geleden | Poll & blog | 295 | 424 | 2 jaar geleden | I'll wait | 2138 | 543 | 2 jaar geleden | Refugees | 1643 | 539 | 2 jaar geleden | Wait for your return | 1336 | 472 | 2 jaar geleden | You are home | 2034 | 524 | 2 jaar geleden | Drive along | 1884 | 422 | 2 jaar geleden | Tell me I'm innocent | 1993 | 412 | 2 jaar geleden | Offers we make | 2096 | 413 | 2 jaar geleden | Special solutions for special needs | 2218 | 408 | 2 jaar geleden | Your real story | 3928 | 414 | 2 jaar geleden | I promise you | 1285 | 341 | 2 jaar geleden | You are my woman | 1199 | 531 | 2 jaar geleden | Empty | 2861 | 363 | 1 jaar geleden |
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Reacties (20)
hoiii
2 jaar geledenHoe gaat het??
Wilde even laten weten dat ik je verhaal echt super vind en niet kan wachten tot je weer een hoofdstukje plaatst.
xxbyeee
ik ga dit deel ook gewoon weer opnieuw lezen want yolo en zo
4 jaar geledenNieuwe Abo! Je schrijft echt geweldig en ik kan niet wachten op een nieuw stukje (:
4 jaar geledenX
verder
5 jaar geledenHi,
5 jaar geledenKomt er vanavond nog een stukje ??
Dit verhaal is echt zo verslavend... xx