“Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from nineteen to here and all the same feel like nineteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breath in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes. And that's only because you're trying your hardest and your hardest and your hardest to push away the only feeling, the only thought, the only thing that's the most important to you. More like a person. A person who got your heart and a person who got your soul and a person who was too blinded by worries and a person who broke you without even realizing. And that person is the person you push away from your thoughts and yourself so you can be fine in five minutes. You hope.” - She said.





“I remember when I was like five or six years old and my mum would tell me stories about love, friendship and sacrifice. She would keep telling me the same stories over and over again, until I was old enough to find out these stories were actually my mum’s.
‘Now you need to make your own stories, about these three things.’ she said. ‘But you don’t have to do it now. Take your time. Your whole life, even.’
From that moment on I kept looking for situations where I could write my stories about. I couldn’t wait to tell them to my mum, and make her proud.
Years passed by, and I still hadn’t experienced something related to love, friendship or sacrifice. I got frustrated, realizing I could never have these long stories like my mum had. That was until I met this girl. We went through so much that I couldn’t even remember everything. It was when she’d left I realized,
being with my mum.
‘Mum,’ I said. ‘I need to tell you my stories. You remember? Love, friendship and sacrifice, like you said.’
Mum looked at me surprisingly, clearly not expecting this at my age already. I was nineteen.
‘Tell me then, sweetheart.’ she said. ‘What’s your love? Your friendship? Your sacrifice?’
I smiled weakly, now obviously remembering everything the girl and I had shared together. ‘A friend, a very very very good friend, is what she was. And she still is, of course.’
Mum smiled at me. I felt uncomfortable.
‘And love... she’s got my heart, mum. Every single piece of it, and I don’t need to have it back at all. She can have it. As long as I can have hers, it’s okay. It’s definitely okay.’
Mum smiled again. Her eyes began to water. I still felt uncomfortable.
‘What would you sacrifice, sweetheart?’ she said softly. I first touched my face, then my lips. Seconds later I touched my neck, then my chest, right where my heart was pounding underneath the skin. When I began to talk, I didn’t feel uncomfortable anymore.
‘I’d sacrifice everything I have. I’d sacrifice all my money. I’d sacrifice my friends and maybe family, too, for God’s sake. Just to keep it simple... I’d sacrifice my life. I’d give it to her. If I needed to, I’d die for her. I really would. If she could only live with me being dead, then I would be. It’s for her, mum. It’s all for her. If she'd just see.’”
- He said.


You are my best friend as well as my lover, and I do not know which side of you I enjoy the most. I treasure each side, just as I have treasured our life together.


One Direction exist
Erm
Enjoy the story
WRITTEN BY ME

A sequel of this finished story
Reading The Moon Is Down first could be an option to get to understand this second part better, although it was written years ago and my writing has improved since. Please don't judge too quick:)




ALERT
Het begin van dit verhaal kan de indruk geven dat het een typische carrot story is; en dat is het dus écht niet! Lees een paar hoofdstukjes door en je zult het vanzelf zien!:)

Hoofdstukken

Titel Woorden Gelezen Aangepast
Dear diary 202 3768 5 jaar geleden
Play 747 3260 5 jaar geleden
Journey 644 2319 5 jaar geleden
Warmth 585 1987 5 jaar geleden
Sleep 736 1964 5 jaar geleden
Dear diary 184 1919 5 jaar geleden
Distance 624 1867 5 jaar geleden
Dreams 944 1782 5 jaar geleden
You 1047 1778 5 jaar geleden
Plans 1017 1675 5 jaar geleden
Prepare 749 1778 5 jaar geleden
Confess 1060 1802 5 jaar geleden
His name 661 1967 5 jaar geleden
Hugs and love 832 1960 5 jaar geleden
Ignoscency 642 1780 5 jaar geleden
Talk that talk 1028 1958 5 jaar geleden
What I've been told 1461 1818 5 jaar geleden
Son, father and guilt 1019 1984 5 jaar geleden
Home is where the heart is 1229 1835 5 jaar geleden
Nerves and sweat 809 1953 5 jaar geleden
Dear diary 128 1885 5 jaar geleden
Shock 1027 1830 5 jaar geleden
Flashback 3139 1932 5 jaar geleden
Garden work 925 1975 5 jaar geleden
Expose the secrets 1115 1921 5 jaar geleden
Acceptance 1344 1885 5 jaar geleden
TCA's 168 1798 5 jaar geleden
Meet you, meet me 1082 1990 5 jaar geleden
Cool down 1167 1954 5 jaar geleden
Eat your food 992 1858 5 jaar geleden
Clean your thoughts 945 2126 5 jaar geleden
See the stars with you 1886 2071 5 jaar geleden
Cry me a river 1458 1974 5 jaar geleden
Don't you worry 1731 1810 5 jaar geleden
Comfort me 1228 1828 5 jaar geleden
Wake me up 1288 1807 5 jaar geleden
Dear diary 203 1682 5 jaar geleden
Call and clarify 1282 1778 5 jaar geleden
Dinner 1787 1913 5 jaar geleden
Reflection 1686 1649 5 jaar geleden
Take your time 1529 1841 5 jaar geleden
Our plan 1908 1821 5 jaar geleden
Stay 1028 1756 5 jaar geleden
Confused 1272 1779 5 jaar geleden
Feelings 1164 1810 5 jaar geleden
Good morning 1362 1671 5 jaar geleden
Comforting kiss 1791 1846 5 jaar geleden
Let me help you 1637 1710 5 jaar geleden
Together rather than alone 1443 1406 5 jaar geleden
It'll be fine 1404 1790 5 jaar geleden
Building's high like I am for you 1791 1636 5 jaar geleden
Curlyhead 1276 1566 5 jaar geleden
Tears 2540 2035 5 jaar geleden
Dear diary 121 1519 5 jaar geleden
Be safe 1163 1593 5 jaar geleden
Desiring lack 4086 1739 5 jaar geleden
What am I doing? 2476 1599 5 jaar geleden
Tea 3803 1428 5 jaar geleden
Pizza's 2279 1583 5 jaar geleden
Tongues and everything 1325 1589 5 jaar geleden
Warm touch 2318 1666 4 jaar geleden
Frown 2099 1544 4 jaar geleden
Leave 3062 1224 4 jaar geleden
Beach 2516 1444 4 jaar geleden
Lost 1923 1714 4 jaar geleden
Hugs 2359 1283 4 jaar geleden
Breaths 1156 1243 4 jaar geleden
Trailer 74 1041 4 jaar geleden
Dear diary 287 1025 4 jaar geleden
(Not?) Giving up 2998 1095 4 jaar geleden
My choice 1738 1211 4 jaar geleden
Meet all of you 3561 1285 4 jaar geleden
Uneasiness 1987 1180 4 jaar geleden
Your brother 2246 1201 4 jaar geleden
Concerten 116 980 4 jaar geleden
Mijn (concert)ervaringen 3110 958 4 jaar geleden
Dusseldorf!!! 168 888 4 jaar geleden
Diner? Diner. 2021 1124 4 jaar geleden
British nights 5327 1279 4 jaar geleden
Can't resist it no more 3239 1221 4 jaar geleden
Shameful subjects 2707 1079 4 jaar geleden
See you later (alligator) 3164 1041 4 jaar geleden
Dear diary 144 844 4 jaar geleden
My story 1324 1023 4 jaar geleden
Meeting you again 4915 1088 3 jaar geleden
Hotels and pizza (and you) 2014 1055 4 jaar geleden
Period issues 1494 994 4 jaar geleden
Paparazzi 2983 1030 4 jaar geleden
You ok? 2571 1242 4 jaar geleden
Fancy the beauty in her dress 2585 1063 4 jaar geleden
Hunger in the suit 2719 1032 4 jaar geleden
Guilt 2739 1158 4 jaar geleden
Don't let me go 2392 1206 4 jaar geleden
Oops 53 835 4 jaar geleden
Not a clue 2693 1029 3 jaar geleden
Phonecalls 3481 1074 3 jaar geleden
I missed you 4130 1062 3 jaar geleden
Realize the solution 3240 1040 3 jaar geleden
Promise me 3021 1155 3 jaar geleden
Surprise, sweetheart 4385 982 3 jaar geleden
Fears and tears 3591 1305 3 jaar geleden
Touch me 5470 1127 3 jaar geleden
Sleepless nights 2222 941 3 jaar geleden
Weird feelings 2924 933 3 jaar geleden
Hey, you 2566 815 3 jaar geleden
Wait, what? 1522 898 3 jaar geleden
Share your feelings 1869 1002 3 jaar geleden
Don't you worry, beautiful 2741 980 3 jaar geleden
Soothing you (a little too well) 2438 1052 3 jaar geleden
Nervously loving 2147 853 3 jaar geleden
The big day's begun 2593 765 3 jaar geleden
Meet your brother 2827 723 3 jaar geleden
Loving you 2760 909 3 jaar geleden
Other reasons 2681 767 3 jaar geleden
Goodnight kiss 2676 786 3 jaar geleden
Accepting us 2423 673 3 jaar geleden
Senses coming to life 2037 661 3 jaar geleden
Guilt 1475 689 3 jaar geleden
Openly dining 2767 626 3 jaar geleden
Quit 2229 629 3 jaar geleden
Wash away the sadness 2193 625 3 jaar geleden
If you come to me 2212 739 3 jaar geleden
When she calls 2551 660 3 jaar geleden
Intensely talking 2617 747 3 jaar geleden
Pulling away 3293 703 3 jaar geleden
Open up 2361 780 3 jaar geleden
Het mooiste concert ooit in Londen, 25/9 1894 592 3 jaar geleden
If I lay here 1960 618 3 jaar geleden
What's bothering you? 2059 559 3 jaar geleden
Wasn't it a joke? 2302 516 3 jaar geleden
No shame 2780 572 3 jaar geleden
Come talk to me 1576 549 3 jaar geleden
The speech (teaser) 1522 777 3 jaar geleden
Gather us together 2481 510 3 jaar geleden
Throw me a tantrum 2141 612 3 jaar geleden
Heavy in your arms 2383 602 2 jaar geleden
Guilty tears 1721 485 2 jaar geleden
If I could fly 1763 525 2 jaar geleden
Calm me down 2928 533 2 jaar geleden
We love you 1428 521 2 jaar geleden
Hold me close 1485 534 2 jaar geleden
Want a drink? 1799 491 2 jaar geleden
Let me worry 2924 487 2 jaar geleden
Hollywood Walk of Coldness 1613 508 2 jaar geleden
Cigarettes and cups of water 1896 523 2 jaar geleden
Only mean well 2239 481 2 jaar geleden
Morning sessions 1607 435 2 jaar geleden
Shudder 1727 529 2 jaar geleden
Sleepy tantrums and a happy embrace 2122 491 2 jaar geleden
Poll & blog 295 416 2 jaar geleden
I'll wait 2138 536 2 jaar geleden
Refugees 1643 525 2 jaar geleden
Wait for your return 1336 466 2 jaar geleden
You are home 2034 515 2 jaar geleden
Drive along 1884 413 2 jaar geleden
Tell me I'm innocent 1993 404 2 jaar geleden
Offers we make 2096 404 2 jaar geleden
Special solutions for special needs 2218 394 2 jaar geleden
Your real story 3928 406 2 jaar geleden
I promise you 1285 334 2 jaar geleden
You are my woman 1199 521 2 jaar geleden
Empty 2861 345 1 jaar geleden

Reacties (20)

  • VampireMouse

    (flower)hoiii


    Hoe gaat het??
    Wilde even laten weten dat ik je verhaal echt super vind en niet kan wachten tot je weer een hoofdstukje plaatst.(H)

    xxbyeee

    2 jaar geleden
  • Tumblah

    ik ga dit deel ook gewoon weer opnieuw lezen want yolo en zo:)

    3 jaar geleden
  • WhereWeArex

    Nieuwe Abo! Je schrijft echt geweldig en ik kan niet wachten op een nieuw stukje (:
    X

    3 jaar geleden
  • iphone4

    verder;)

    4 jaar geleden
  • Manonxxx

    Hi,
    Komt er vanavond nog een stukje ??
    Dit verhaal is echt zo verslavend... xx

    5 jaar geleden

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